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A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
by Erma Bombeck

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck

Related topics: Funny Friendship Relationship

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck

Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck

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Thank you for joining me on this journey we call life,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous

The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.
- Maya Angelou

The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you,
whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard

The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung

Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley

The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous

If you wish to succeed in life,
make perseverance your bosom friend,
experience your wise counselor,
caution your elder brother,
and hope your guardian genius.
- Joseph Addison

I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson

Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman

The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau

The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Health is the greatest possession.
Contentment is the greatest treasure.
Confidence is the greatest friend.
Non-being is the greatest joy.
- Lao Tzu

The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez

The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson

Neither a borrower nor a lender be,
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
- William Shakespeare

Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau

The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar,
but I cherish the friend who for me
does not consult his calendar.
- Robert Brault

You are my friend when you can guard my failure,
challenge my thought and celebrate my success.
- Anonymous

When it hurts to look back,
and you're scared to look ahead,
you can look beside you
and your best friend will be there.
- Anonymous

The only reward of virtue is virtue;
the only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

This communicating of a man's self to his friend
works two contrary effects;
for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in half.
- Francis Bacon

Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing.
- Benjamin Franklin

I choose you as my friend, and rejoice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The most I can do for my friend is simply be his friend.
- Henry David Thoreau

A friend is one who walks in when others walk out
- Walter Winchell

We can never replace a friend.
When a man is fortunate enough to have several,
he finds they are all different.
No one has a double in friendship.
- Johann Schiller

Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me; I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.
- Albert Camus

An old friend will help you move.
A good friend will help you move a dead body.
- Jim Hayes

Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.
- Anais Nin

Moreover if your brother shall trespass against you,
go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.
- Matthew 18:15

A new friend is like new wine;
when it has aged you will drink it with pleasure.
- Ecclesiastes 9:10

Love is the only force capable of
transforming an enemy into friend.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend.
- Bill Watterson

Better to be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life without a friend is like death without a witness.
- Spanish proverb

He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller

So long as we are loved by others,
I would almost say that we are indispensable;
and no man is useless while he has a friend.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

A friend knows the song in my heart
and sings it to me when my memory fails.
- Donna Roberts

A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway.
- Jerome Cummings

Go oft to the house of thy friend,
for weeds choke the unused path.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Anybody can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend,
but it requires a very fine nature
to sympathize with a friend's success.
- Oscar Wilde

A friend is someone who won't stop
until he finds you and brings you home.
- Fraser Sr. in the movie Due South

A brother is a friend given by Nature.
- Jean Baptiste Legouve

A real friend is one who walks in
when the rest of the world walks out.
- Walter Winchell

One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.
- Euripides

In everyone's life, at some time,
our inner fire goes out.
It is then burst into flame
by an encounter with another human being.
We should all be thankful for those people
who rekindle the inner spirit.
- Albert Schweitzer

Throw your dreams into space like a kite,
and you do not know what it will bring back,
a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country.
- Anais Nin

A true friend is one who believes in you
when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
- Anonymous

A friend is one who has the same enemies as you have.
- Abraham Lincoln

You only meet your once in a lifetime friend ...
once in a lifetime.
- Little Rascals

In my friend, I find a second self.
- Isabel Norton

A sister is a gift to the heart,
a friend to the spirit,
a golden thread to the meaning of life.
- Isadora James

Never cease loving a person, and never give up hope for him,
for even the prodigal son who had fallen most low,
could still be saved; the bitterest enemy
and also he who was your friend could again be your friend;
love that has grown cold can kindle
- Soren Kierkegaard

The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous

A friend is a present you give yourself.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

A true friend is a rock upon whom you can depend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The only way to have a friend is to be one.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A friend or co-worker shares a political,
religious, economic, or social opinion
that is opposite to yours -
does that drive a wedge between your hearts?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A true friend is a source of strength and hope.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The best mirror is an old friend.
- Proverb

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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie