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Laurence J. Peter Quote of the Day

Welcome to these Laurence J. Peter Quotes of the Day from my large collection of positive, romantic, and funny quotes.

Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter

Related topics: Sad Feeling-Down Cute Whimsey Wisdom Cynical

There are two kinds of failures:
those who thought and never did,
and those who did and never thought.
- Laurence J. Peter

You can always tell a real friend: when you've made
a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
- Laurence J. Peter

Facts are stubborn things,
but statistics are more pliable.
- Laurence J. Peter

 

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why
the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
- Laurence J. Peter

Work is accomplished by those employees who have not
yet reached their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
- Laurence J. Peter


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Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell,
and advertise.
- Laurence J. Peter

Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults,
but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
- Laurence J. Peter

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing
our parents' shortcomings.
- Laurence J. Peter

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
- Laurence J. Peter

A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
- Laurence J. Peter

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable
force to an immovable object.
- Laurence J. Peter

As a matter of fact is an expression that precedes
many an expression that isn't.
- Laurence J. Peter

Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter

A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.
- Laurence J. Peter

Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses,
is in the eye of the beholder.
- Laurence J. Peter

The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls;
the soldier details his wounds,
the shepherd his sheep.
- Laurence J. Peter

Originality is the fine art of remembering what you
hear but forgetting where you heard it.
- Laurence J. Peter

In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Democracy is a process by which people are free to
choose the man who will get the blame.
- Laurence J. Peter

America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.
- Laurence J. Peter

If you don't know where you're going,
you will probably end up somewhere else.
- Laurence J. Peter

America is a country that doesn't know where it is
going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.
- Laurence J. Peter

You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water.
Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.
- Laurence J. Peter

Men now monopolize the upper levels...
depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly
intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
- Laurence J. Peter

Slump, and the world slumps with you.
Push, and you push alone.
- Laurence J. Peter

A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
- Laurence J. Peter

The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
- Laurence J. Peter

Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
- Laurence J. Peter

Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
- Laurence J. Peter

Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before
Father Time takes it away.
- Laurence J. Peter

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind,
what is the significance of a clean desk?
- Laurence J. Peter

Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will
establish a reputation as an expert.
- Laurence J. Peter

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
- Laurence J. Peter

The great question is not whether you have failed,
but whether you are content with failure.
- Laurence J. Peter

A censor is an expert in cutting remarks.
A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
- Laurence J. Peter

Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
- Laurence J. Peter

An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart
he would have been not to have taken it.
- Laurence J. Peter

Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time
when the quo has lost its status.
- Laurence J. Peter

It's better to have loved and lost than to have to
do forty pounds of laundry a week.
- Laurence J. Peter

When in doubt or danger, run in circles,
scream and shout.
- Laurence J. Peter

Committees have become so important nowadays that subcommittees
have to be appointed to do the work.
- Laurence J. Peter

There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it,
and the rest of us.
- Laurence J. Peter

Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian
than going to the garage makes you a car.
- Laurence J. Peter

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Education is a method whereby
one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
- Laurence J. Peter

Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
- Laurence J. Peter

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis"
is composed of two characters.
One represents danger and the other represents opportunity.
- John F. Kennedy

Every tomorrow has two handles.
We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety
or the handle of faith.
- Henry Ward Beecher

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Unity can only be manifested by the Binary.
Unity itself and the idea of Unity are already two.
- The Buddha

To live a satisfying life requires two steps...
1. Plan your life goals.
2. Act on your plan - every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When I am getting ready to reason with a man,
I spend one-third of my time thinking about myself
and what I am going to say
and two-thirds about him and what he is going to say.
- Abraham Lincoln

We have two ears and one mouth so that
we can listen twice as much as we speak.
- Epictetus

Cause and effect are two sides of one fact.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated;
you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
- David Lloyd George

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth
- not going all the way and not starting.
- The Buddha

As you grow older you will discover that you have two hands.
One for helping yourself, the other for helping others.
- Audrey Hepburn

You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
- old proverb often attributed to David Lloyd George

Winners must have two things:
definite goals and a burning desire to achieve them.
- Anonymous

Pride comes in two flavors -
choose honor, not ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein

A wise man hears one word and understands two.
- Yiddish Proverb

People generally complain about only two things:
when they have less than yesterday,
and when they have less than their neighbor.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Pride comes in two flavors -
be careful which you choose -
choose honor, not ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I had three chairs in my house;
one for solitude, two for friendship, three for society.
- Henry David Thoreau

Two little words that can make the difference: START NOW.
- Mary C. Crowley

The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung


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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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